Impossible Lesbian Would You Rather! [CC]


– Hello, lovely people, andwelcome back to our channel.

Well– – Your channel, yeah.

– It’s my channel.

And then when I want to do fun gay things, I bring you along.

Now the last video that we did together was deep and personal and real and a bit of a downer.

– Was it? Which one was that? – In Rome when I was like feeling really– – Oh, no, you were a downer, I was okay.

– Yeah, fair, okay.

But I thought we’d do something fun, and when this impossiblewould you rather challenge for lesbians went ’roundour friends, I was like, let’s make a video! So this is a BuzzFeed quiz.

Love a BuzzFeed quiz.

– I love a quiz.

– I’ll leave the linkdown in the description, so that you too can take this quiz, even if you’re not a lesbian.

– Sorry, I can’t stoplooking at your eyebrows.

– I just had my eyebrowsmicrobladed today.

(laughing) Do they look really red? – No.

– Anyway, I’m reallyexcited ’cause tomorrow, for the first time in years, I’m going to wake up with eyebrows.

– Oh my god.

I’m gonna be like who are you? Get outta my bed! No, I won’t.

– Question one, would you rather never cut your fingernails again, or have a permanently sprained wrist on your dominant hand? – Oh, well, I don’t– – Whether you have anaversion to finger nails.

– I don’t ever cut mynails, my fingernails, because I still have a really bad habit of biting/picking them.

You don’t really see me do it.

I don’t know when I do it.

– No, I’m not sure when you do it.

– Maybe actually— She doesn’t cut them, but they never grow.

– Maybe I don’t actually do it.

Maybe they just don’t grow.

– Are you all right? Maybe you’re a zombie.

Oh, no, zombie fingernailsgrow, don’t they? – Do they? – Nevermind.

I hate the idea of nevercutting your fingernails, and they go loopy and gross.

– Oh, wait, what was it? – So I think I’ll just live with the– – Oh, never cut my finger nails again? Oh, I thought it was like, oh, well, yeah, no, I answered it because I don’t need to, yeah.

(laughing) – So you’ll choose the never cut my fingernails again option.

– Yeah, because also– – Because apparently you’ll be fine.

– Also you could bite them, or pick them.

– I think cut means never– – No it doesn’t, it’snot what they’re saying.

I’d rather just bite my nailslike I already do than– – Permanently sprained wrist.

– Yeah.

– I mean– – And which wrist isit, is it my dominant? I mean, I need both my hands.

– It literally says have a permanent sprained wrist on your dominant hand.

– It says cut nails rather than– It doesn’t say- Oh my God.

We’re spending too much time on this one.

She’s now going to tell you about how she’s ambidextrous, so she’ll be fine.

– Let’s move on to the next question.

It was meant to be fun.

– Would you rather date someone with the same name as you or date someone who lookseerily similar to you? – Eerily similar, I think I’d rather date someone with the same name.

– Yes.

– Because if it was eerily, then that’s a bit like you’ve already answered your own question.

– (laughing) Like everytime you walk in somewhere, people go twins, wow.

And you’re like– – Yeah, and we already getasked if we’re sisters.

– No, we make out.

Yeah, I agree, same name.

Same name, less weird.

Would you rather– – Because we could justbe like Jessie, Jess.

Jessica and Jess, there’s already– – Jessie and Jessica, it works.

– Yeah, I mean, there’salready Rose and Rosie.

– Claud and Claudia.

Yeah, Rose and Rosie make it work.

So we could do it, it’d be fine.

– I mean, I don’t know, somepeople think we look the same.

People at passport control— Oh my god.

– Never know whichpassport to hand us back.

They’re like thank you.

– I don’t know how.

Would you rather have atotally perfect gaydar or have the magical ability to never fall for a straight girl? – Oh, I’d much rather havea totally perfect gaydar.

– Yeah, so you kneweveryone’s sexual preference.

– Also, it’s just stupid.

It’s the same thing.

Do you want a gaydar or do you never want to go for a straight girl again? – I think it means that you’d never fall for a straight girl.

Because you could knowshe was a straight girl but still fall for her ifyou had a great gaydar.

– I see what you mean.

Because does it really matter if you have a good gaydar or not, whereas if you fall for, yeah.

I don’t know, I thinkthere’s some kind of virtue, is that the right word? In falling for a straightgirl that you can never have.

You have to learn to– – Oh, yeah, it’s a riteof passage for lesbians.

– Yeah, and also, it’s not love.

You realize it’s not love.

– We’ve all been there.

– It’s like you’re loving afantasy that will never happen, and that can still happen with a gay personbecause they might not be who you think they are meant to be.

So it’s all just a learning curve of love.

– Everything is a learning curve.

Would you rather have Ellen DeGeneres elected US president or have Ellen Page become US president? – I think Ellen DeGeneres because it plays would just be full of sunshine andrainbows and happiness, and if there was any sortof too much seriousness, I think she would justdeal with it with humor.

– Sure.

– Whereas I think Ellen Page could be maybe a bit too serious.

– I think Ellen Page because I believe she’d be more radical.

– Whoa.

– That’s what you want.

A president who changes things.

– Oh, well, I mean, that’s true.

– Would you rather be at a lesbian bar with only couples or be at a lesbian bar with only closeted ladies? Spend our lives in lesbianbars with only couples.

– Why would they be at alesbian bar if they’re closeted? – Well, I don’t know! – Why would the whole lesbian bar be filled with closeted– (laughing) Then they’re not closeted ladies! – It’s a fake straight night! – Well, I’d rather be at a lesbian bar with only closeted ladiesif they were willing to be – Uncloseted.

– Well, not uncloseted, but if they were up for a nice time.

– Yeah.

– I mean, obviously thisis when I was single.

– No, it’s all right, I understand.

– But obviously now– – You’re not hypotheticallycheating on me.

– Now that I’m married, obviouslyI’d rather be at a lesbian bar with only couples.

– Correct answer! Would you rather haveto be BFFs with your ex or have to be BFFs withyour ex’s new girlfriend? (crickets chirping) – Well, is it actually, isthis a theoretical question? – I think it’s a theoretical girlfriend, not our actual exes.

– Okay, well, I don’t know.

– We didn’t do the lesbian thing where you stay best friends with your ex.

– But then why are we using theoretical? Maybe we should use our actual exes.

– Oh.

Okay, sorry, our actual exes.

– Then I’d rather be bestfriends with her friend.

– With her girlfriend, fair enough.

I feel like mine may havemarried a man by now.

Not sure.

– What? Oh no, what if she’swatching and she hasn’t? – Oh, I’m really sorry.

– Well, I mean, to be fair, I just told mine that I’d ratherbe friends with her friend.

Maybe we should cut this bit out.

– I think she knows, (laughing) it’s okay.

BFFs with the ex’s new girlfriend because she could be great.

And I have nothing against her.

– I think there’s areason if you’re not BFFs.

We’re not even friends, let alone BFFs.

We were exes.

So we’re clearly just going to be friendswith their girlfriends.

– Would you rather neverhave to deal with a period ever again or getpregnant with your partner without any medicalprocedures or you know, dudes.

Yeah, and I would have no periods.

– What was the other option, though? All I heard was pregnantand I was like yeah.

I really don’t even mindperiods, they’re fine.

– Okay, well, I get terrible migraines and can’t carry a baby, so.

– Well, you can have optionone and I’ll have option two.

– I think that’s an excellent life.

Go us! Would you rather have a lady date with the US Women’s National Soccer Team or a lady date with the castof Orange is the New Black? What’s a lady date? Is that where you’re friends or is it a date but for lesbians? Shouldn’t I know this as a lesbian? – I was like, it’s a bit intimidating, like the whole cast andthe whole soccer team.

– There’s only two of us.

– I think personally, the castof Orange is the New Black.

– Yeah, same.

– Because we watchedthat and we’d feel more– – I would know who they were.

I’m afraid I don’t knowwho the soccer team are.

Oh, wait, was that theone with that Megan girl? – Ellen White? – We’re so sorry, we’re so sorry! We’re bad lesbians.

Would you rather erase the term scissoring from the world’s vocabulary or have all lady pornbe directed by ladies? I’m really enjoying the overuse of the word lady in this quiz.

– Just have all ladyporn directed by ladies.

But it would have to be ladieswho know what they’re doing.

– That’s true, just because they’re ladies doesn’t mean they understand lesbians.

– Yeah, they could be like, oh, I did a porno with another girl.

I know how to do it.

And they have no idea.

And they just mimic whatthey got told by a man.

– That’s so sad.

Also, I don’t really careabout the word scissoring.

Yes, it’s annoying whenpeople bring it up, and yes, it’s annoyingwhen they ask how it works.

And no, I don’t know.

– I keep doing thisbecause I’m really tired.

– Oh, bubba, we’re very close.

– And also, I really hate my hair tonight.

I need to wash it and look at my eyes! They’re sunken into my head.

– Would you rather haveXena Warrior Princess come back or have Buffy theVampire Slayer come back? – Sorry, I’ve got to tie up my hair.

You know what, I actuallywould prefer Xena obviously.

I mean, she’s a warrior princessin a really cool outfit.

Buffy just wears teenager clothes.

– Buffy ages through the series.

And no, her fashion doesn’tnecessarily improve.

– Also, Buffy is the worst character out of the whole Buffy series.

– That— She is! She’s really irritating.

– Is so not true! I mean, Wesley exists.

– Well, okay, I mean, there’s a few exceptions.

But she is quite annoying.

– Dawn gets really annoying.

No, she starts really annoying.

She’s just really annoying.

Buffy has good moments.

– I like Giles.

– And his real name is Rupert.

It’s Rupert Giles, Ilike the name Rupert, so.

Would you rather have everyone constantly confuse yourgirlfriend for your sister? Can’t relate.

Or have everyone constantlyconfuse your girlfriend for your best friend? – I’d rather a best friendbecause that’s kinda true.

We are best friends.

– Oh, yeah, I mean, we are best friends.

– It’s like yeah, we’rebest friends who have sex! – Yay, and pledge to live together in holy matrimony forever.

– Yeah, whereas if everybody were like, yeah, they’re sisters that have sex! It’s a bit– (laughing) – Okay! I mean, people do oftenask us if we’re sisters.

And it’s very annoying for me.

So I’m gonna say bestfriend because it’s true.

– Well, that’s what I said.

– Would you rather come out of the closet with a parade through your hometown or with a speech on national television? – Oh my God, is the parade just for you? – It’s just your hometown, it’s just for you.

It’s just a parade about you coming out.

– It’s not like you came out around Brighton Pride time and just joined in.

– No, not like therewas a parade happening and then you leapt in andwent I’m gay, whoo, walk on.

There’s a banner that says Claudia is out! Everyone’s wearingt-shirts with your face on.

There’s perhaps a blow-up balloon version of you that people arerunning through the streets and everyone’s throwing confetti.

– Yeah, well, I think I have my answer.

– Yeah?- National TV.

Because, I will tell you why.

Your whole think of this scenario with the parade freaked me out.

Because it’s like face to face people.

– Yeah, you don’t go to that.

– And I don’t like to be smilingand oh yes, overwhelming.

Whereas you can do it to a camera piece.

You could be in a room, on your own, almost, or just a camera crew.

You say your piece.

– You could! – You maybe go oh, you bluffed that one.

Get to do it again.

– Yeah, they edit it.

– Edit it, make it really, have some epic music behind it.

And then it goes out, andthen when it goes out, it’s out of your control and then you don’t have to be directly in line of people’s responses so then people have time to think about it and then come talk to you.

– Interesting, this is very true.

This is why Claudia talksa lot more in videos than she does in real life.

Because you can’t answer back.

– Yeah, that’s true.

– I would like a parade.

– We are yin and yang.

– Ah, so good for each other.

Would you rather forever haveTegan and Sara’s hairstyles or always be rocking CameronEsposito’s lady mullet? – [Claudia] I mean, they’reliterally the same hairstyles.

– [Jessica] No, she’s got a mullet.

It’s like a mullety bit on one side.

– But they both have thissweeping fringey thing.

The only difference is thatCameron Esposito has a long bit.

Do we have to? – I don’t want to, we’reskipping this question.

– Well, maybe because wehave to do it together, we can be Tug and Tegan.

(laughing) We can be Targen.

We can be Tegan and Sara, sorry.

– Tegan and yeah, them, those ones.

Yeah, yeah, and then everyone will really be like are you sisters? Yeah, sure.

Would you rather live in a world where being gay was the norm or keep things the way they are now and keep on being a badassunique, unique badass.

Oh, I’m so sorry, I did it again.

– Badass.

Yeah, I was trying to tell Jessica this morning that it’s ass, badass.

Otherwise you’re just a bum.

– A badass is a person who’s cool.

But a bad ass is just flat.

– No, I think, I don’t know.

I think I’d rather it, doesit just flipped the norm? – Yeah, I mean, does itmean that percentage wise the heterosexual percentage is now the homosexual percentage? Is that what it means? – Do we have memory of the time when before it was not the norm? – Perhaps we would not.

Because otherwise how could you continue? – Because I was thinking if it was like we havethe history and memory of it flipping and it was reversed, then I’d say I want it to be the norm because hopefully then, the gay majority, assuming that we’re the majority, would be less discriminatingagainst other sexualities.

– Yes because theyremember their own pain.

– Yeah, exactly.

– I don’t know, I think it would be, I’m happy either way, I’m happy with my life.

I mean, I’d like there to be no oppression of gay people at all.

And by gay people, I meanpeople who are not just heterosexual obviously.

So bisexual people and pansexualpeople, asexual people.

– I just said different sexualities.

– Group everyone.

– That was so much easier.

– That was so much easier, yeah.

I’m so sorry, oh my God.

– And I was basicallysaying the same thing as you but I just said in a different way.

I mean, sometimes it has its perks.

I do quite like walking into a room and I’m like yeah, this is my wife.

And I can tell people turn their heads and are like oh, look, lesbians.

You know, it’s quite cool.

I feel like little celebrities.

Don’t you think? It’s a bit like, yeah, we’re proud of who we are.

You know, that is quite nice.

– Yeah, whatever.

– We are badasses.

(laughing) – So we’ve reached the end of the quiz.

– All right, what’s the answer? – There was no answer.

– What?- I know.

– What is this pointless quiz? What, have you not– – I really thought that there would be.

– What?- No, sorry.

– Aw, I thought it was gonna tell me sorry, you’re not gay or yes, you are gay.

– You’re wearing a blazer.

– I’m wearing a blazer.

(laughing) Yeah.

– You’re wearing a blazer with liberation female on your t-shirt.

So what have we learnt from this quiz? – Nothing! (laughing) – Absolutely nothing.

– That I’m tired andhave very thin patience after a long day at work.

– Thank you so much for watching! I hope you’ve enjoyed this episode of Lesbian Would You Ratherwith Jessie and Claud.

You can follow us on Instagram, and if you’ve enjoyed this video and you’d like to see more, you can subscribe to this channel because I put out videos twice a week.

Sometimes they have Claudia in them.

I love you.

– I love you.

Bye!- Bye! (bright jazz music).

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